The Power Of Support Groups: Benefits Of Joining A Women's Support Group And What To Expect

I have been creating and running support groups for a very long time and they are one of my favorite things to do as a therapist. There is something so deeply empowering and healing in being a part of a women’s support group in particular.

I am starting a virtual Women’s Relational Trauma, Anxiety, and Self-Trust Support Group this month, so I wanted to share a little bit if you feel nervous about starting a group, what to expect in a virtual support group setting, and what the benefits may be. This can apply to most groups, though every therapist may run it differently have different themes!

A support group is a form of therapy or support where there is a group leader/facilitator (in this case a therapist) and a group of people (group members). In my groups, I like it to be smaller and more intimate so usually up to 6 people and sometimes less. But you may find groups with more group members. Everyone has a shared challenge and goal - whether everyone is struggling with anxiety, a recent loss, a desire to deepen their interpersonal relationships and grow, etc.

Why join a support group?

• If you are feeling isolated and alone in your specific struggles

• If you would like to learn from other people going through very similar challenges to you

• If you would like more specific skills and tools to overcome challenges 

• If you would like to expand your insight and knowledge outside of just individual therapy

• If you would like to have a community of other women on the same type of healing path as you

• If you would like to build connections with peers in addition to getting support from a therapist

• If you would like a new experience in healing and growth or to deepen your healing

The power and benefit of groups:

1. Feeling less alone!!! Its simple yet so deeply powerful. When were in therapy, often your therapist will validate and normalize something for you which is super helpful. But actually hearing from group members who are going through completely similar challenges, is so deeply validating and really does make you feel less isolated and alone. It reminds you of your humanness.

For example, the reason my group is super niche to anxious, people pleasing women working on building self trust and improving relationships with others/themselves especially carrying a history of trauma within the context of relationships is because this is my specialty and I work with tons of women going through these exact sets of challenges! If you resonate with these struggles like boundary setting, putting other people first, being anxious in your relationships, not wanting to disappoint people - you are not alone!

2. Decrease in shame - going off of the previous one, shame lives on when you hold things in and don’t share with others. Shame makes you want to hide and isolate and makes you believe something is wrong with you. When you open up and share your story or your challenges and especially hear that you are not alone, you are breaking the shame cycle and releasing that.

3. Gain support and connection from your peers and a therapist

In support groups, even if there is some learning and teaching, you get the space to talk about what you are going through and connect with other people. You will hear kind words, support, maybe even feedback or suggestions (if wanted) form your peers/group members, not just the therapist! Though in my groups, I also will chime in and facilitate in a way where I am a part of the conversation too.

4. Accountability

It’s easy to be in therapy and then forget to implement what you are working on outside of sessions. In a group setting, you are coming together each week and talking about it as a group so its a nice way to be held accountable to doing the work. For example, to start actually practicing self care or to start setting boundaries. Obviously you will not be pushed to, but its helpful when you have a group of people checking in with you each week and even helping to problem solve what happened if you struggled.

5. Specific learning/increasing your tools

My support groups are quite niche because I think it's helpful to learn about the topic you are interested in, or the challenge you're struggling with. Connecting and sharing with others is important, but also learning ways to work on your goals of changing and healing to me is also important. For example, in my womens relational trauma group we will learn why you people please, what is people pleasing vs kindness and how to overcome it. I will also lead mindfulness exercises and mindful self compassion practices so you are practicing the skills too not just talking about them.

6. Financially

The good news about groups is they are cheaper than individual therapy on a week  to week basis, so whether this is your only form of therapy or an addition ot your individual, it may be more accessible than individual. And, if you have out of network insurance reimbursement you may be able to submit superbills to your insurance and they often reimburse you a certain amount which really helps.

7. Exposure therapy if you have any anxiety or social anxiety

If you struggle with anxiety, espeically social anxiety - this is a great way to face the discomfort and eventually decrease it by being in a group of people and learning to speak. Or, say you struggle with boundary setting - you can practice what you are going to say with others there helping.

8. Improving interpersonal dynamics

In groups, you are also practicing your interpersonal and social skills, even if you dont struggle with that - it helps! For example, say you struggle to speak up honestly and share how you feel with people, group is a good way to practice that. Or even deeper, if you struggle to let someone know that they upset you - group could be a safe environment to practice that as well. It also just teaches you how to be vulnerable and honest in a group of humans, which will always strengthen your relationships and ability to connect.

So if you are contemplating joining a group - try one and see. It may not be for everyone, but after you get past any discomfort it will be a huge way to grow.

Here are some tips for how to get the most out of group:

-Embrace the discomfort and lean into vulnerability with participating. After you feel comfortable with the group, see how it feels to open up and share. Similar to your therapist, you aren’t going to see these people outside of the group session so open up and really share your struggles. Participating is a huge way to gain something back. And, on the other hand if you need time at first thats okay too. Sit back and listen until you feel ready you wont be forced!

-Have a journal on hand.  Take notes and jot down insights discovered! In my groups, I actually give journal prompts and we write during the group but even outside/after jot down the thoughts and feelings you have, any new things you’ve learned.

-Set up your space to feel comfy! If its a virtual group the great news is you get to have a comfortable space. So get a nice drink nearby, wear comfortable clothes, have a candle on or essential oils and really lean into the self care aspect of this group. In my groups I lead a mindfulness exercise to start, so if you have a space that is set up for optimal environment it’ll feel nice to try these exercises if you are comfortable.

-Ask questions and speak up about your needs!

Groups are what you make it I always start my first session asking what the group needs and how to make it a safe place  - so speak up! Request topics, share your goals. Talk about what you need to feel like you’re gaining something. Ask questions to other group members and to the group leaders, this is your space!

What to expect?

Every group leader runs their groups differently, but typically in the first group session you will spend time getting to know one another, setting goals and intentions for the groups, and discussed what group sessions will look like and what the expectations will be from the group to keep it going. Often after the first session you will dive in. 

You will get chances to speak and share whats on your mind, respond to other group members giving or receiving support, accountability, and feedback if you are looking for it, and if its a topic themed group like mine, you will do some learning or practicing of exercises and get to talk about your experience after.

The cool thing about group is you make it your own and you can always offer suggestions and share what you need. If you need some time and space to open up, thats okay there wont be pressure on you! You want to feel comfortable and like you can open up and be vulnerable.

For my group in particularly the way I love running it is we start with a mindfulness exercise to get grounded. Then I open the floor to see if group members have any thing they want to share or check in on (wins, challenges, thoughts, feelings). Then I typically have a handout ready to share about - so for example with my relational trauma, anxiety, and self trust group we will go over emotional needs so I will bring a handout out on what emotional needs are and talk about it and then have journal prompts prepared so everyone can write. Then, we will discuss it together and group members will respond to one another. Sometimes if I have a specific skill to teach like mindful self compassion - I will lead it so everyone can practice and learn about it and then talk about their experience.

So all in all, if you are contemplating joining a support group I recommend you try it once before making a call on whether it works for you or not. Groups are a special way of working on yourself and you will definitely gain something.

If you are interested in my Womens Relational Trauma, Anxiety, and Self-Trust Support Group -

Schedule a free 20 min phone consultation to see if its the right fit for you and learn more details, schedule directly here

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